If i were president jokes

A president is the one who is the head of government. He/she is the symbol of all the people. It’s a huge post to be on. Plus a lot of responsibilities though, piles of pressure too. …Joke: Why did the first blonde president move out of the oval office? Punch Line . VOTE. First Blonde President Joke Meme. Election Joke. ... Joke: A busload of politicians were driving down a country road when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer's barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate.Azimio la Umoja One Kenya Alliance leader Raila Odinga has applauded 4 leaders who were elected on Thursday, November 17 to represent Kenya at the East Africa Legislative Assembly (EALA). In a statement on Friday, November 18, the former Prime Minister congratulated the four Azimio allied politicians (Winnie Odinga, Kennedy Kalonzo, Kanini Kega, and Suleiman […]"Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." -- Bill Clinton "If one morning I walked on top of the water across the …"Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." — Bill Clinton Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping? Because he couldn't lie. "In my many years I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress." — John AdamsKimmel joked that Trump is actually running “in a bid to become the first American to lose the popular vote three times in a row.”. The host also touched on how “many prominent Republicans are moving to distance themselves from Trump after the midterm election.”.18 News Jokes. Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship. As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: "Save the women!" George W. Bush hysterically hollers: "Screw the women!" Bill Clinton's asks excitedly: "Do …Feb 16, 2016 · With the 2016 Presidential Election looming, we thought it would be fun to ask students what might happen if they were the president. The responses are thoughtful, humorous, and pretty Polish President Andrzej Duda has said that the missile that hit his country on Tuesday was "probably an accident" from Ukraine's air defenses.Nov 06, 2018 · Abraham Lincoln has the honor of being named the funniest president by Senator Bob Dole in his Great Presidential Wit (…I Wish I Was In The Book). And one of his funniest lines ever has to be ... kendall county well permitHis task was made easier because President Carter had been alienated from the ... nation when his jokes on the operating table were relayed to the public, ...Feb 16, 2016 · With the 2016 Presidential Election looming, we thought it would be fun to ask students what might happen if they were the president. The responses are thoughtful, humorous, and pretty If I were President, if I were President. I'd make sure all the money spent. Onnnnnnnn, good things. I wouldn't have no lint in my pocket. I'd rock it rock it I'd shock it. I would not jock the ...The General Overseer of Household of God Church, Rev. Chris Okotie, on Sunday said President Goodluck Jonathan would not have contested the 2015 presidential election were it not for Pastor Ayo Oritsejafor's 'false prophecy'.According to him, the former President had initially made up his mind not to vie for the election, but stated that Oritsejafor 'deceived' him with tales of victory as ...3 Okt 2012 ... From increased funding for NASA to laws to punish bullying with prison time, more Elk Grove students say what they would do if they were ...If I were President, I would use the bully pulpit of the White House to encourage Congress to pass Congressman Ron Paul's Sanctity of Life Act. In short, this bill would do two things: First, it would declare that unborn babies are persons under the law. Second, under the authority of Article.November 4, 2009, 8:31 PM. Throughout the U.S. presidential campaigns of the last decade, foreign policy took a back seat to the economy, family values, Social Security, and taxes. But American ...If you were in the President's place. . . Joke: Nominated for quote of the year is this statement made by Dick Armey, R-Texas. When asked if he were in the President's place, would he resign, he... the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! Here's a look back at some of his funniest moments. (Video: Victoria Walker/The Washington Post) Barack Obama, at the 2012 White House correspondents’ dinner. “I have a lot more material ... income tax california calculator IGF 2010 VILNIUS, LITHUANIA 13 SEPTEMBER 10 SESSION 17 1415 MANAGING THE NETWORK *****Note: The following is the output of the real-time captioning taken during Fifth Meeting of the IGF, in Vilnius. Although it is largely accurate, in some cases it may be incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors. It is posted as an aid to understanding the proceedings at the ...Polish President Andrzej Duda has said that the missile that hit his country on Tuesday was "probably an accident" from Ukraine's air defenses.Participants of the First League of KVN told what jokes the organizers of the TV game ask to be cut from the speeches. About the forbidden jokes kaveenshchiki told in the show “Limit” on YouTube- channel Andrey Predelin. According to the KVN team, there is no list of prohibited joke topics in the First League, …If I Were a President Essay. 2022/04/21 Free Essay Samples. At the time of the founding fathers, the US was intended to be a weak republic with maximum autonomy granted …After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. It was more "humane". Vote: share jokeIf I Were President Narrative Craft | Presidents Day Writing Prompt by The Mountain Teacher 1 $3.00 PDF February Writing Prompts have never been so engaging. Get creativity flowing and pencils moving with this fun narrative prompt on If I Were President. This activity is perfect around Presidents' Day. mkcert certificate not valid Kimmel joked that Trump is actually running “in a bid to become the first American to lose the popular vote three times in a row.”. The host also touched on how “many prominent Republicans are moving to distance themselves from Trump after the midterm election.”.If I Were President. Children describe the basic duties of the U.S. President, from campaign speeches to lighting the national Christmas tree. Cheery illustrations, simple text, and the …Presidential clock. After dinner one night, Bill Clinton drops his pants and points at his manhood, telling Hillary if she is going to be President, she better get to know the Presidential clock. She yells, "That's not a clock", to which he responds, "If you put two hands and a face on it, it will be!" 👍🏼. no deposit bonus codes for wild casinoWashington was not interested in being a part of politics, but it was clear ... Benjamin Franklin did his best to lighten the mood with jokes when the mood ...Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves. “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.”. — Bill Clinton. “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.”. — Jimmy Carter. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people." Her parents beamed with pride. "Wow...what a worthy goal." I told her. "But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that.Ronald Wilson Reagan was an American politician who served as the 40th president of the ... When Reagan left office in 1989, he held an approval rating of 68%, ...If You Were Jokes This joke may contain profanity. 🤔 I am over 18 So my Professor said "if you were granted invisibility for one day what would you do?" I said, " I'd go to Paris and find a mime and beat the crap out of him and the applause from the crowd would be outstanding! " If you were 8 years old when “Red Red Wine” was released UB40 nowOne of my favorite stories is of Coolidge. He was brand new, and had selected his cabinet. They were invited to breakfast with the President at the White House. All were dressed in formal suits. The breakfast room was quiet as they awaited the President. Coolidge walked in and sat down. He picked up his coffee cup, so the Cabinet did the same.18 Sep 2019 ... “If I were just 80 years old, if I was 15 years younger, I don't believe I could undertake the duties I experienced when I was president.”.Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people." Her parents beamed with pride. "Wow...what a worthy goal." I told her. "But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that.What important historical fact can one learn from Mount Rushmore?…. The best American Presidents were stoned. ( South Dakota Jokes) Teacher: “John, do you know Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address?”. Student: “No, Miss Frump. I thought he lived in Washington!”. Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?…. At the chopping mall.Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.” — Bill Clinton “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” — Jimmy CarterIf I Were President. October 14, 2010. By Birder SILVER, Waterboro, Maine. More by this author. If I were president, two of my main focuses would be reducing job cuts and going 'Green'. My ...If i were the president i'll ban the use of monetary exchange or the use of money & make trade by barter the compulsory means of buying & selling in a business Re: If I Was President by CuteTj ( m ): 3:00pm On Jun 16 , 2012Not in attendance for the president's final turkey pardoning ceremony were first daughters Sasha and Malia Obama, who gamely laughed alongside their father last year. So instead, the president's nephews Austin and Aaron Robinson stood by for what Obama called his "corny-copia of dad jokes about turkeys." "Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." -- Bill Clinton "If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: 'President Can't Swim.'" --Lyndon Johnson "If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?" - -Abraham Lincoln"Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." -- Bill Clinton "If one morning I walked on top of the water across the … clo conference 2022 If I Be President - Jokes Etc - Nairaland. Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / If I Be President (1484 Views) I Be Ajekpako,who You Be. ... With recent happenings with the election and postponement, if you were president; wetin u for do? Guys air your views. Re: If I Be President by oderemo(m): 5:39pm On Apr 05, 2011;"No problem." replied the President and, with that, Bush hung up and called the President of condom company, "I need a favour, you've got to send 100,000,000 condoms right away over to Russia." "Consider it done," said the President of condom company. "Great! Now listen, they have to be red in colour, 10 inches long and 3 inches in diameter."A red, white and blue recession. With great TV. There were times when there was an almost fever-dream-like quality to Hunt’s speech. Where there was an unbridgeable gap between fantasy and ...We collected only funny Prison jokes around the web. Enjoy the best Prison jokes ever! Home; Topics; Funniest Jokes ... He reminded her that Nelson Mandela wasn't elected President until after he had served 27 years in prison. ... and said, "I cannot believe you were caught exposing yourself to a child in high school!" "Elementary, my dear ...During a midterm campaign speech in California, President Joe Biden joked that "there's no climate problem." A 19-second clip of his remarks — which were more than 30 minutes long in total — circulated on social media without any context. ... Biden's 'there's no climate problem' comment was a joke, not proof climate change isn ...18 News Jokes. Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship. As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: "Save the women!" George W. Bush hysterically hollers: "Screw the women!" Bill Clinton's asks excitedly: "Do …5 Apr 2022 ... “Mr. President, welcome back to the White House, man,” he said, embracing his sidekick role when it was his turn to speak.If I Were President: My thoughts and opinion on what's right and wrong about America. by Randy Shore | Jul 7, 2017. 4.0 out of 5 stars 1. Paperback. $3.58 $ 3. 58. Get it as soon as Thu, Oct 13. FREE Shipping on orders over $25 shipped by Amazon. Kindle. $0.00 $ 0. 00. Free with Kindle Unlimited membership Join Now.By PTI. BENGALURU: President of Karnataka Congress D K Shivakumar on Thursday questioned as to why government funds were used to install a 108-feet statue of Bengaluru founder Nadaprabhu ... audi modem upgrade Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses …Polish President Andrzej Duda has said that the missile that hit his country on Tuesday was "probably an accident" from Ukraine's air defenses.However, it was Joe who had announced to everyone when he was a young boy that he would be the first Catholic to become President."No problem." replied the President and, with that, Bush hung up and called the President of condom company, "I need a favour, you've got to send 100,000,000 condoms right away over to Russia." "Consider it done," said the President of condom company. "Great! Now listen, they have to be red in colour, 10 inches long and 3 inches in diameter." TikTok video from ash lillian (@ashispeachy): "#stitch with @🍧seahörse president 🎺🦆 you opened this convo up @Ray William Johnson with your first vid you posted. this couldve been you accepting your original comment was in good faith but had elements of ignorance, it wouldve been a great learning opportunity. instead you victimised yourself and tried to tell us mob what we should be ...When photographs of Truman wearing them hit the newspapers, people showered the Little White House at Key West, Florida, with gift shirts. Since there were far ...If I were Used in a subjunctive mood, 'if I were' indicates an unreal situation. Something that can never happen. You are imagining a situation, that isn't true yet or cannot be true. If I were Bill Gates, I would be the richest person in the world. If I were wrong, I would correct my mistakes.Feb 20, 2022 · What important historical fact can one learn from Mount Rushmore?…. The best American Presidents were stoned. ( South Dakota Jokes) Teacher: “John, do you know Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address?”. Student: “No, Miss Frump. I thought he lived in Washington!”. Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?…. At the chopping mall. job application for animal shelter Russia's veto power in the 15-member Security Council has blocked the U.N.'s most powerful body from taking any action since President Vladimir Putin ordered the invasion."Being president is like running a cemetery: you've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening." — Bill Clinton Why did George Washington have trouble sleeping? Because he couldn't lie. "In my many years I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress." — John Adams19h. Franklin and Marshall College. Fan Pop. With the turning leaves and the breaking out of our scarves and hats, we are clearly beginning to spend more time indoors …To get you geared up to celebrate this holiday properly, we're saluting these presidential knee-slappers. Ronald Reagan "I am not worried about the deficit. It is big enough to take care of...PRESIDENT OBAMA RUNS OUT OF MONEY President Obama was dining out one night and was about to order dessert when a presidential aide whispered into his ear, "Mr. President, I apologize for interrupting, but you're out of money." "Let me be clear," President Obama said, "that is just partisan right-wing fear mongering."Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, 'If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?' She replied, 'I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people.' Her parents beamed. 'Wow...what a worthy goal.' I told her, 'But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that.Sunday, November 13, 2022 - South Kabuoch Member of County Assembly Ouma Ochieng has revealed how President William Ruto will become a one-term President in 2027. Ruto is only two months in office but the majority of his supporters, especially from the Mt Kenya region, have already lost trust in him due to his lies and fake promises.Once the threat of nuclear war had abated, Americans found the situation hilarious, and decided to memorialize Reagan's famous quip by instituting National Presidential Joke Day on August 11th. To get you geared up to celebrate this holiday properly, we're saluting these presidential knee-slappers. RONALD REAGAN "I am not worried about the deficit.22 Mar 2022 ... In a Monday morning interview with Fox Business's Stuart Varney, Trump offered that if he was president right now, he'd threaten Vladimir Putin ...Participants of the First League of KVN told what jokes the organizers of the TV game ask to be cut from the speeches. About the forbidden jokes kaveenshchiki told in the show "Limit" on YouTube- channel Andrey Predelin. According to the KVN team, there is no list of prohibited joke topics in the First League, … amal carburettors for sale 22 Mar 2022 ... In a Monday morning interview with Fox Business's Stuart Varney, Trump offered that if he was president right now, he'd threaten Vladimir Putin ...A president is the one who is the head of government. He/she is the symbol of all the people. It’s a huge post to be on. Plus a lot of responsibilities though, piles of pressure too. …Apr 27, 2016 · Here's a look back at some of his funniest moments. (Video: Victoria Walker/The Washington Post) Barack Obama, at the 2012 White House correspondents’ dinner. “I have a lot more material ... If we were going to equate it to something, it would be the same feeling you get when you see a 7 ft 1 in Shaquille O’Neal grasping a regular-sized water bottle with his ginormous hands. Weirdly disarming, funny, and cute. All at once. Read more >Kimmel joked that Trump is actually running “in a bid to become the first American to lose the popular vote three times in a row.”. The host also touched on how “many prominent Republicans are moving to distance themselves from Trump after the midterm election.”.A red, white and blue recession. With great TV. There were times when there was an almost fever-dream-like quality to Hunt’s speech. Where there was an unbridgeable gap between fantasy and ... seniors interstate travel concession Presidential clock. After dinner one night, Bill Clinton drops his pants and points at his manhood, telling Hillary if she is going to be President, she better get to know the Presidential clock. She yells, "That's not a clock", to which he responds, "If you put two hands and a face on it, it will be!" 👍🏼.This is a fake ‼️ This film is about the Smolensk catastrophe in which the Polish president with his wife and members of the government were killed. A total of 96 people. Don't make such jokes about people's deaths. 17 Nov 2022 21:05:39WASHINGTON (AP) ' Hillary Rodham Clinton took a celebratory lap around Washington on Friday, collecting the endorsement of a major union and reveling in signs Democrats are coalescing around her White House candidacy after an 11-hour grilling by House Republicans.Joking about her "long day," Clinton told female supporters gathered for a party event that she tried to "rise above partisanships ... village green tennis courts The best American Presidents were stoned. ( South Dakota Jokes) Teacher: “John, do you know Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address?” Student: “No, Miss Frump. I thought he lived in Washington!” Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?… At the chopping mall. How many presidential aides does it take to change a light bulb?… None.Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people." Her parents beamed with pride. "Wow...what a worthy goal." I told her. "But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that.Joke: Why did the first blonde president move out of the oval office? Punch Line . VOTE. First Blonde President Joke Meme. Election Joke. ... Joke: A busload of politicians were driving down a country road when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer's barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate.Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.” — Bill Clinton “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” — Jimmy Carter 101 President Jokes. Written by Melvin H. Berger. From George Washington to Barak Obama…from school days to summertime…here are hundreds of hilarious jokes which offer wacky humor for all readers!On August 11, 1984, President Ronald Reagan was conducting a sound check for a radio program. "My fellow Americans," he said, "I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will...What are some of the most offensive things presidents or presidential candidates have been caught on camera saying? “I moved on her, and I failed. I'll admit it. “I did try and fuck her. She was married. “And I moved on her very heavily. In fact, I took her out furniture shopping. She wanted to get some furniture.Book Reading 'If I Were President' 108,772 views Nov 9, 2012 209 Dislike Share Save Onceuponatimetheshow 451 subscribers Enjoy a live-reading of the colorful picture book 'If I Were...Learn when to use both correctly. Read on to learn how to use these phrases correctly. If I were is used when the subject of the sentence is referring to a hypothetical or imaginary situation. If I were good at math and science, I would’ve become a doctor. If I was is used to refer to a situation that actually happened in the past.If I were Used in a subjunctive mood, 'if I were' indicates an unreal situation. Something that can never happen. You are imagining a situation, that isn't true yet or cannot be true. If I were Bill Gates, I would be the richest person in the world. If I were wrong, I would correct my mistakes.Modesty, thy name is Donald Trump. And away we go! 2. “Together we built the greatest economy in the history of the world.”. This is an oldie-but-goodie from Trump’s 2020 stump speech. And ...This joke may contain profanity. 🤔 I am over 18 Watching a presidential debate with a friend. Republican: I am going to smoke crack and burn down all the houses in your hometown. Democrat: I will also burn down all the houses in that same town, but I will smoking meth, not crack. Third party rep: I don’t do drugs and disavow arson.Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.” — Bill Clinton “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” — Jimmy Carter IAMA NSA Security Policy Senior with a lead role related to the Mar-A-Lago case. Last week we were given the go-ahead to freely discuss the nature of any and all missing classified documents as President Trump's verbal declassification was deemed valid by our internal review.A: Presidentures! Q: What was General Washington's favorite tree? A: The infantry! Q: In what way was George Washington like a monster? A: In no way, thankfully! Q: What would you get if you crossed the first US president with an animated character? A: George Washingtoon! Q: Was General Washington a handsome man? A: Yes, he was George-eous!A list of 38 President puns! Related Topics. President: President most commonly refers to: President (corporate title) President (education), a leader of a college or university …By October 1980, she had been promoted twice and held the position of vice president of strategic planning. However, Mary Cunningham was forced to resign after two months of public rumors that her rapid promotions in the Bendix company were the result of a romantic relationship with William Agee, her boss and mentor. The case raises fundamental ...Not in attendance for the president's final turkey pardoning ceremony were first daughters Sasha and Malia Obama, who gamely laughed alongside their father last year. So instead, the president's nephews Austin and Aaron Robinson stood by for what Obama called his "corny-copia of dad jokes about turkeys."The people of the United States choose a president every four years. They vote for the person they want to run their country. But the president does not run the country alone. According to an important plan called the Constitution, written more than two hundred years ago, a group of people called the Congress make the laws.Abraham Lincoln has the honor of being named the funniest president by Senator Bob Dole in his Great Presidential Wit (…I Wish I Was In The Book). And one of his funniest lines ever has to be ...Trump began his remarks by saying: “Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests, and my fellow citizens, America’s comeback starts right now.” He claims that before the 2020 election the US was on the cusp of a “golden age”. Unsurprisingly, reaction on social media was swift.4 former US Presidents are caught in a tornado Four former U.S. Presidents are caught in a tornado, and off they spin to OZ. After trials and tribulations, they finally make it to the Emerald City and come before the Great Wizard. "WHAT BRINGS YOU BEFORE THE GREAT AND POWERFUL WIZARD OF OZ? WHAT DO YOU WANT?" Jimmy Carter ... upvote downvote report This joke may contain profanity. 🤔 I am over 18 Watching a presidential debate with a friend. Republican: I am going to smoke crack and burn down all the houses in your hometown. Democrat: I will also burn down all the houses in that same town, but I will smoking meth, not crack. Third party rep: I don’t do drugs and disavow arson. 15 polyps removed Only the best funny Vice-president jokes and best Vice-president websites as selected and voted by visitors of Joke Buddha website. Funny Jokes. Funny Jokes; Top Rated; Most Discussed. Recent; Random; Tell a Joke; One-liners ... "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we ... rio shuttle to strip 2022 If you were in the President's place. . . Joke: Nominated for quote of the year is this statement made by Dick Armey, R-Texas. When asked if he were in the President's place, would he resign, he... the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha!If You Were Jokes This joke may contain profanity. 🤔 I am over 18 So my Professor said "if you were granted invisibility for one day what would you do?" I said, " I'd go to Paris and find a mime and beat the crap out of him and the applause from the crowd would be outstanding! " If you were 8 years old when “Red Red Wine” was released UB40 nowFormer President Donald Trump announced that he will seek re-election to the presidency in 2024, setting the stage for a dramatic return to the White House after losing in 2020 to Joe Biden.FINISHED TRANSCRIPT. EIGHTH INTERNET GOVERNANCE FORUM . BALI. BUILDING BRIDGES - ENHANCING MULTI-STAKEHOLDER COOPERATION FOR GROWTH AND SUSTAINABLE DEVELOPMENT. 23 October 2013Jokes About Engineers (8 of them) 24 related questions found. Who were the presidents in the Great Depression? The Depression caused major political changes in America. Three years into the depression, President Herbert Hoover, widely blamed for not doing enough to combat the crisis, lost the election of 1932 to Franklin Delano Roosevelt by an ...What are some of the most offensive things presidents or presidential candidates have been caught on camera saying? “I moved on her, and I failed. I'll admit it. “I did try and fuck her. She was married. “And I moved on her very heavily. In fact, I took her out furniture shopping. She wanted to get some furniture.A man is on a street corner in Moscow yelling “The president is an idiot “ Police surround him and handcuff him. They say “it is illegal to insult President Putin” He says “You don’t understand I mean the Ukrainian president, Zelensky, he is the one I was insulting “ The police captain says “you can’t fool us, everyone knows who the idiot is”Abraham Lincoln has the honor of being named the funniest president by Senator Bob Dole in his Great Presidential Wit (…I Wish I Was In The Book). And one of his funniest lines ever has to be ...By PTI. BENGALURU: President of Karnataka Congress D K Shivakumar on Thursday questioned as to why government funds were used to install a 108-feet statue of Bengaluru founder Nadaprabhu ...Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people." Her parents beamed with pride. "Wow...what a worthy goal." I told her. "But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that. rehome adopt a pet His dad thought for a while and answered, ''Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the work force, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.'' ''I still don't get it'' responded the Little Johnny. ''Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,'' said the dad.Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.” — Bill Clinton “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” — Jimmy Carter 5th - 6th ISBN 9780545110334 Themes fiction 101 President Jokes Written by Melvin H. Berger From George Washington to Barak Obama…from school days to summertime…here are hundreds of hilarious jokes which offer wacky humor for all readers! Support Materials We offer many activity ideas for supporting books of this type here.Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.” — Bill Clinton “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.” — Jimmy Carter Top 10 Election Jokes. ( Election Jokes) Social Studies Jokes. Google Search “Election Jokes”. Someone just asked me, “Who do you think will win the 2020 Presidential …Presidents Day Jokes #9 – 1. Presidents Day Jokes #49 – 40. Presidents Day Jokes 49. Why did Lincoln wear a tall, black hat? To keep his head warm. 48. If you crossed a … sex party tube 18 News Jokes. Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship. As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: "Save the women!" George W. Bush …Six people have been killed and 81 injured after an explosion on Istanbul's popular pedestrian thoroughfare İstiklal Avenue, in a bomb attack that Turkey's president described as an act of ...I recently asked my friend's little girl what she wanted to be when she grows up. She said she wanted to be President some day. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people." You can explore vice president adviser reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean vice president presidency dad jokes. There are also vice president puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. japanese font style generator Here's a look back at some of his funniest moments. (Video: Victoria Walker/The Washington Post) Barack Obama, at the 2012 White House correspondents’ dinner. “I have a …Presidents Day Jokes Q: What did Abe Lincoln put on his pancakes? A: Lincoln Log Cabin Syrup. Q: What’s the most popular automobile brand for presidents? A: Lincoln. Q: What did they call …Modesty, thy name is Donald Trump. And away we go! 2. “Together we built the greatest economy in the history of the world.”. This is an oldie-but-goodie from Trump’s 2020 stump speech. And ...Abraham Lincoln has the honor of being named the funniest president by Senator Bob Dole in his Great Presidential Wit (…I Wish I Was In The Book). And one of his funniest … author signings near me Civil War Jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny. Lincoln is doing well in theaters, historically this has not been true. If you were a president, you'd be Babe-raham Lincoln. I went to this Gentleman's club in Pennsylvania and this babe Lincoln gave me the Gettysburg undress. Presidential QuotesDuring a midterm campaign speech in California, President Joe Biden joked that "there's no climate problem." A 19-second clip of his remarks — which were more than 30 minutes long in total — circulated on social media without any context. ... Biden's 'there's no climate problem' comment was a joke, not proof climate change isn ...Feb 20, 2022 · What important historical fact can one learn from Mount Rushmore?…. The best American Presidents were stoned. ( South Dakota Jokes) Teacher: “John, do you know Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address?”. Student: “No, Miss Frump. I thought he lived in Washington!”. Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?…. At the chopping mall. If I were Used in a subjunctive mood, 'if I were' indicates an unreal situation. Something that can never happen. You are imagining a situation, that isn't true yet or cannot be true. If I were Bill Gates, I would be the richest person in the world. If I were wrong, I would correct my mistakes.Presidential Jokes by Presidents Themselves. “Being president is like running a cemetery: you’ve got a lot of people under you and nobody’s listening.”. — Bill Clinton. “My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.”. — Jimmy Carter. iStock Sophie (5): “I would make sure every kid had a house to live in.” Riley(7): “I would build the entire country out of LEGOs.“ Molly: “ I would say that there should be no more wars, ever.”. Jacob: “ I would conquer the world.” Nate (8) writes: If I were president I would:-Make no school.-Let kids make the rules.-Make everything free.Only the best funny Vice-president jokes and best Vice-president websites as selected and voted by visitors of Joke Buddha website. Funny Jokes. Funny Jokes; Top Rated; Most Discussed. Recent; Random; Tell a Joke; One-liners ... "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we ... black chicago influencers 19 Jan 2021 ... Joe Biden will be sworn in as the 46th president of the United States. ... We asked TFK Kid Reporters, “If you were elected president, ...Trump began his remarks by saying: “Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests, and my fellow citizens, America’s comeback starts right now.” He claims that before the 2020 election the US was on the cusp of a “golden age”. Unsurprisingly, reaction on social media was swift."If I were President, they wouldn’t have sat me back there – and our country would be much different than it is right now! "In Real Estate, like in Politics and in Life, LOCATION IS …This worksheet for Presidents Day provides three spaces for children to write down what they would do if they were President. If I were President, I would.22 Mar 2022 ... In a Monday morning interview with Fox Business's Stuart Varney, Trump offered that if he was president right now, he'd threaten Vladimir Putin ... druid 5e